Tuesday, September 22, 2009

I Want You To Fight For Me;


"You've Beaten My Emotions To The Breaking Point."
________________________________
His name showed up on my caller i.d today and I broke into tears. He'll ignore me for days and then out of the blue tell me that he misses me. Why can't my fuck buddy be clear with what he wants. Take me or leave me don't pull me around like I'm your little toy, because I'm not.... I'm a girl with feeling and I take things to heart when I should't. You said you loved me and I'll never forget that night when we were at Johns house and you said something to piss me off and you took my hand and you said "Baby don't act like that you know I love you." WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT ABOUT HUH?! It's like it's a fucking continues circle, I'll get so far away but I end up right back where I started. Can you not let me go? Can I not let you go? Is it going to happen any time soon? Are you really in love with me? Is this all a mind game to keep me around? Your more complicated than a girl. I thought girls were hard to understand but you are worse than we are. I'm honestly so stressed out and so confused over you that it is giving me a migraine.  Not only are you causing me mental pain but it's growing into a psychical pain. You can't see anything your so....so....so... ignorant! Why can't you just grow up and act your age, your graduated from high school and you know what you want to do with your life. Stop talking about it get up and do it. Why can't I just ignore you? Why can't I stop thinking about you? Why can't I just walk away from you? You've got death grip on my heart, why can't you just let it go? I know I promise you I would never leave and I would wait but why should I wait when I know it's not going to happen? I mean you even told Anna that you had no intentions of dating me but you tell me something different the next day. What do you want from me? Make up your mind and let me go? Someone's got to go? I can't pull myself to my feet anymore I've tried to walk away to many times but you keep pulling me back it and I feel like I'm getting lost in this black hole and I can't escape and it's getting darker and every time I run away you pull me in and drag me deeper and deeper into your fucked up heart that's empty.... I'm the only thing in there because Tasha left you.... Thats why you pull me in to fill your empty heart and kill your loneliness till she comes back to you. You use me because you know I'm to weak to get to my feet and run. You know me so well.
_______________________________________________________


"Dear God, make me a bird. So I could fly far. Far far away from here."

No comments:

Post a Comment